Too Many Long Boxes!

End of Summer
logo by Ben Grose

by Michael Condon and David R Black

1) Alfred is to Batman as __________ is to the Heckler
a) El Gusano
b) Ledge
c) Francois
d) I've hated these analogy things ever since I got an 800 on the SAT

2) The Heckler's (somewhat) secret identity is:
a) Stu Mosely
b) Johnny Mosely
c) Stu Johnny
d) Bob Pinaha

3) Believe it or not, both the Heckler and Vext series were based in the same fictional town. What was the town's name?
a) River City
b) Ciudad de Chistoso
c) Hoboken
d) Delta City

4) Before being stripped of his powers and exiled to Earth, Vext was the god of:
a) Inappropriate exhibitionism
b) Ill timed flatulence
c) Mishap and misfortune
d) Relationships gone hellishly wrong

5) Ambush Bug's arch enemy is:
a) The Generic Man
b) Aaron Caldwell
c) Low Sales Figures Lass
d) Arggh! Yle!

6) Ambush Bug is unable to take off his costume. Why?
a) The zipper is stuck
b) Repeated teleportation caused the costume's atoms to merge with his body
c) The heat from one of Fire Lad's sneezes fused the Bug permanently inside
d) Zatanna placed a curse on him after the Bug stole her fishnets.

7) What is the name on the clown faced alien race who gave G'nort a power ring?
a) The Guardians
b) The Poglachi
c) The Giffenites
d) The Andorians

8) Justice League Antarctica was defeated by __________?
a) Their own incompetence
b) The Mighty Bruce
c) Killer penguins
d) The Extremists

9) Mr. Nebula, the nearly omnipotent decorator and fashion designer, is a spoof on Marvel's Galactus. Galactus' herald was the Silver Surfer. Who was Mr. Nebula's herald?
a) Silver Swan
b) Golden Glider
c) Red Rollerskater
d) Scarlet Skier

10) The Japanese version of Ambush Bug is named ____________ ?
a) Bug San
b) Mitsu Bishi
c) Ah So
d) Hon Da

11) The dismembered head of a certain editor was a frequent guest star in the Ambush Bug mini-series and one shots. The head belonged to which editor?
a) Joe Orlando
b) Andy Helfer
c) Julius Schwartz
d) Karen Berger

12) Armed with only a bowling ball and a flashlight, which Justice League staff member defeated an entire platoon of Imskian warriors?
a) Sue Dibney
b) Maxwell Lord
c) Oberon
d) Catherine Cobert

13) Mr. Nebula's secret identity is ____________ ?
a) Kit Chen Zink
b) Kirtan Rodd
c) Lam P. Shade
d) Nick Knack

14) In Chronos #1 million, Ambush Bug is revealed to have moved to the year 11,021 AD and set up residence in Hong Kong. How is he making a living?
a) He's running "Buggy World," an amusement park devoted to his exploits
b) He and Cheeks are the current tag team champions in the IWF (Intergalactic Wrestling Federation)
c) He begs for food from passersby
d) He owns a bar named Croma Zone

15) In "World's Funniest," Mr. Mxyzptlk and Bat-Mite destroy every alternate Earth and dimension except one. Which one do they spare?
a) Earth-Three
b) Gemworld
c) Earth-Prime
d) Skartaris

16) The Silver Age Bizarro lived on an imperfect duplicate of Earth.  In what way was his Earth different from ours?
a) The world is inside out.  The surface of the world consists of molten rock which gets cooler as one goes closer to the center.  The core is a hollow sphere 2000 miles in diameter.  The interior surface of this world is almost exactly identical to the surface of our earth except that its on the inside rather than outside of a sphere.  Since beings walking along the surface of this sphere have 6,000 miles of rock under their feet and another 6,000 miles of rock starting 2,000 miles above their head, the gravitational attraction coming from the nearer wall is much stronger than from the opposite, so gravity works in the direction away from the center of the planet.  The center consists of a fifty mile wide sphere.  Half the sphere glows white hot while the other is and dead white.  This sphere rotates, completing a circuit every 24 hours, thus acting as both sun and moon for the inhabitants of Bizarro world.  Gouts of flame are continuously breaking off from the sun side.  They are invisible on the light side of the planet due to the much brighter "sun," but serve as the stars for the night side of the planet until they burn out on their own accord.  Bizarro enters the planet through a hole in the North Pole where his Fortress of Fame is kept.  Because the area has a direct conduit to the molten exterior, Bizarro world's North Pole is its hottest location.  The South Pole is its second hottest because it also constantly receives the direct rays of the Bizarro world sun.
b) The entire planet, including its oceans, are made of cardboard boxes.
c) It is cube shaped.
d)It looks like a shattered globe that was put back together by a blindfolded man wearing boxing gloves.  It has the same cracked uneven appearance as Bizarro's face and South America is upside down.  (Brazil is located on the southern end of the continent.)

17) Pulsar Stargrave was an android with a mind that rivaled Brainiac 5's (he claimed to be the 30th century form of the Silver Age Brainiac)  and plasma blasts as impressive as Sun Boy's radiation powers.  He was once summoned to spearhead a computer lead coup against the citizens of a United Planets world.  What followed was one of the most embarrassing defeats of any galaxy class villain.  What happened?
a) Chuck Taine injected him a hypodermic needle filled with the same formula that gives him his bouncing powers.  Stargrave's last words were "Foolish human, that won't work on an andr awp!"  Chuck then rolled the would-be conqueror into a Science Police holding cell.
b) After having his nose bitten off by Matter Eater Lad, Tenzil Kem added injury to insult by  dropping Stone Boy on top of him, splitting him in half.
c) He clobbered a squadron of the Legion of Superheroes.  He remotely reprogrammed Brainiac 5's forcefield belt to trap the boy genius inside, blew apart Wildfire's containment suit, knocked Phantom Girl completely out of sync with the earth dimension, dispatched Ultra Boy with another plasma blast after Ultra Boy following a previously implanted post-hypnotic suggestion took out Dawnstar, Shadow Lass, Star Boy and Timber Wolf and even brought down Mon El after an intense battle. Duo Damsel, a former member, was coincidentally in the area shopping.  She fought back her fear of having another body being killed by a robot and entered the fray.  She so annoyed Pulsar Stargrave through taking evasive action by hiding one body while the other taunted the villain and then recombining so that the exposed body was no longer in harm's way that she managed to maneuver the angry android into aiming a remote controlled Mark VIII laser cannon at her when she was between the cannon and her assailant.  Blammo.  Needless to say, she escaped.
d) He had created an artificial black hole that was stabilized by his plasma powers and was in the process of sucking a contingent of Legionnaires into it, when Ambush Bug, on one of his visits to the 30th century  popped in, tripped and knocked Pulsar Stargrave into his own black hole.  Ambush Bug was made an honorary member of the Legion of Superheroes, but resigned when he met Jimmy Olsen at an honorary member meeting.

18) When Ambush Bug went on trial, who was his lawyer?
a) Two Face.  Of course he also acted as prosecutor so Ambush Bug's trial was rather unpleasant for the green costumed galoot.
b) Matt Murgatroyd, a parody of  Marvel character Daredevil's alter-ego, the blind lawyer Matt Murdoch.  A whole lot of tasteless blind lawyer gags followed.
c) The Atom's ex-wife, Jean Loring.  His case was hampered, because as her day job is prosecutor, she really didn't want to defend him.
d) Cheeks the Toy Wonder, the Ambush Bug's inanimate sidekick.  All he did was sit on the floor while Ambush Bug screamed at him to do something.

19) DC shredded all copies of Elseworlds 80 Page Giant that they could find due to one of the stories inside.   1500  issues had been distributed to Great Britain before the order to shred to came down, making the surviving issues very valuable collector's items.   Oddly enough the offending story was reprinted in the Bizarro Comics hardcover.  What was the story about?
a) Adam wearing Batman's cowl and nothing else worries that efforts to protect Eve from a Joker headed snake might reveal his secret identity.
b) A teenage girl's frantic attempts to keep an eye on super infant Clark Kent.  Among other things, the Baby of Steel drinks milk directly from a cow's udder and gets locked inside a microwave oven that gets turned on.
c) A parody of the Fantastic Four that delved into gynecological humor.
d) A Batman story that had a racist slur graffitied on a wall.  No, I'm not going to write it down here, as doing so may endanger our relationship with DC.  They'll tolerate us as we don't embarrass them.  In DC's defense the slur was only discovered by a visiting Julius Schwartz because the term has not been in common use since the 1940's, well before DC's current editorial staff's time.

20) Which Keith Giffen created character started out as a fairly serious character before turning into a parody of  grim and gritty characters?
a) Lobo
b) Creeper
c) The Heckler
d) Hawk

21) What was the name of the title character of Sergio Aragones' Fanboy?
a) Finster
b) Chester Gamaliel Stanczek
c) His birth name was unrevealed, but he had it changed to Dick Grayson.
d) It was never given.  Mark Evanier said in an interview that they didn't give him a name in order to make the character seem more universal.

22) Who does the voice of Mr. Mxyzptlk in  Superman the Animated series?
a) Frank Welker
b) Mark Hamill
c) Gilbert Gottfried
d) Carrot Top

23) Not even Sammy Sosa hits the ball out of the park every time.  The creator of Brother Power the Geek, the Green Team and Prez, some of the worst comics of all time, also had a hand in creating which well-known characters?
a) Spiderman and Dr. Strange
b) The Demon and the New Gods
c) Captain America and the Challengers of the Unknown
d) John Stewart and Ras Al Ghul

24) In Young Justice #1,000,000,  the Young Justice heroes, consisting of future versions of Robin, Superboy and Impulse, found a life pod containing one of the original members of Young Justice, and debated on who they would find inside.  Who did they find?
a) Red Tornado.  He was able to hear their bickering the entire time and got so disgusted that he left the Young Justice clubhouse to find the Hourman of this time period.
b) Secret. She was very annoyed that they didn't mention any of the female members of the team.
c) The Scavenger.  He had originally designed the lifepods as traps for the members of Young Justice, but Impulse accidentally knocked him into it and caused its suspended animation rays and rocket engines to go off.  Impulse never figured out what happened.
d) They got into such an intense argument that they decided to speed up the cryonic revival program so that they could find out the answer sooner.  Unfortunately, they sped up the process so much  that the body inside was reduced to ash.

25) In  a crossover with Dark Horse, which DC character put on the Mask?   The Mask being the wooden mask that transforms its wearer into a yellow zoot suited, green headed, loony juggernaut with powers reminiscent of a Warner Brother's cartoon character written by Chuck Jones on the ultimate caffeine buzz.  Jim Carrey played the wearer of the mask in a 1994  movie by the same name.
a) Batman
b) Joker
c) Commissioner Gordon
d) Black Mask

26) Mr. Mxyzptlk's first appearance, he ran around an art gallery screaming for McGurk.  In that story McGurk was an animated statue, but why did he name that statue McGurk?
a) Mr. Mxyzptlk takes on a new personality every 1,000 years.  The personality he had before becoming a mischievous imp was a demonic entity.  McGurk was the greatest hero of the first world he conquered. Mr. Mxyzptlk transformed all of this hero, except for his eyes and brain, into stone and had him placed in his throne room so he could watch all of the atrocities committed by the fifth dimensional demon. Mr. Mxyzptlk revived the statue for his first act as a prankster in order to say goodbye to his past life.  He kept a tight reign on McGurk's speech and actions of course, but a post-crisis retelling of Mr. Mxyzptlk's origin recounts that Superman noticed that the living statue had the most haunted eyes he had ever seen.
b) Mr. Mxyzptlk had been trapped in a bottle of oil by a Persian sorcerer 2300 years before his first appearance.  The archeologist who accidentally freed him, Arthur McGurk, didn't know how to control this odd genie. Mr. Mxyzptlk saw no reason to either reward or punish the man, but did name his first prank in 2300 years in his honor.
c) A time traveling Mr. Mxyzptlk, who was a humorless scientist in this incarnation discovered the absurdity of  life when faced with an extremely dorky teenager named Mick Gurk.  He decided to become a prankster in honor of this Three Stooges loving dweeb.
d) He named the statue after his brother Mr. Mcgrkxtpk.


1) B. Ledge is the Heckler's confidant, just as Alfred is Batman's. El Gusano is the faceless mob boss from Heckler #1. Francois is the cook at the restaurant owned by Stu Mosely (a.k.a. The Heckler).

2) A. Stu Mosely. Johnny Mosely is a US Winter Olympian and Bob Pinaha is a DC letterer.

3) D. Delta City.

4) C. Mishap and misfortune. Blazon is the goddess of inappropriate exhibitionism, Rypta Gud'n is the god of ill timed flatulence, and Paramour is the goddess of relationships gone hellishly wrong (She's visited me quite a few times!)

5) D. Arggh! Yle! The Generic Man is a Heckler villain, and Aaron Caldwell is the "rogue archaeologist" from Vext's series.

6) A. The zipper is stuck

7) B. The Poglachi.

8) C. Killer penguins. The Mighty Bruce was Major Disaster's cellmate and fellow Injustice Leaguer. The Extremists were Justice League Europe villains. If you guessed A, their own incompetence, you may be right!

9) D. The Scarlet Skier.

10) B. Mitsu Bishi

11). C. Julius Schwartz

12) C. Oberon's heroics occurred during the Invasion crossover. The "flashlight" was actually Blue Beetle's flash-gun.

13) B. Kirtan Rodd.

14) D. He owns a bar named Croma Zone

15) C. Earth-Prime. The two imps are scared away by the sight of Julius Schwartz hard at work in the DC offices.

16) C. A fair number of people have believed that the Earth's surface is on the inside of a sphere surrounded by rock. I don't understand how, but there you have it.  The modern Bizarro created a replica of Metropolis out of cardboard boxes and other junk inside a large warehouse.

17) B. Stone Boy was accorded Bismoll's highest honors for this feat.

18) A. Two-Face.

19) B. Letitia Lerner, Superman's Babysitter was the offending story.  A splash page for the Batman in paradise story was in the 80 page giant, but not in Bizarro comics.  An issue of League of Extraordinary Gentlemen had to be destroyed and reprinted due to a gynecological joke involving Marvel comics.

20) A. Lobo. The Heckler was never meant to be treated seriously.   Hawk was created by Steve Ditko and Steve Skeates.  The Creeper was created by  Steve Ditko and Don Segall.

21) A. Finster.

22) C. Gilbert Gottfried. Frank Welker played Mr. Mxyzptlk in the Superfriends, as well as Darkseid, Kalibak, Toyman, Marvin and Wonder Dog.  He's also provided the voices for Hefty Smurf, Slimer, Simpson's dog Santa's Little Helper, Freddie from Scooby Doo and about a hundred others.  Mark Hamill has played the voice of the Joker.

23) C. Joe Simon created Captain America and the Challengers of the Unknown in tandem with Jack Kirby.  Jack Kirby also created the Demon and the New Gods.  Stan Lee and Steve Ditko created Dr. Strange and Spiderman.  Denny O'Neil created Green Lantern John Stewart and Ras al Ghul.

24) D. One wonders if Secret would have had any right to be upset.  True the members of the 853rd century's incarnation of Young Justice could argue that their namesakes were the founders of the group, but they remained the only members for a very short time.  The team encountered Secret during the Girl Frenzy event that immediately followed YJ #3 and Wonder Girl and Arrowette joined in issue # 4.

25) B. The Joker. I think the Joker planting the Mask on Commissioner Gordon would have made a better story.  Joker running around like a nut with super powers while interesting, is not as fun as super-powered, maniacal Commissioner Gordon.  Batman would have been put in the untenable position of protecting his worst enemy from his best friend

26) C. Alan Moore's story, "Whatever Happened to the Man of Tomorrow?" introduced the idea of Mr. Mxyzptlk adopting a new persona every thousand years, but that was an Elseworld. Grant Morrison's JLA story Crisis Times Five introduced the idea of the fifth dimensional imps as having a weakness for being trapped in enclosed spaces filled with liquid, but Mr. Mxyzptlk never had to suffer that indignity. The serious Mr. Mxyzptlk encountered Mick Gurk in Young Justice #3.

Mike Condon, Fanzing's trivia quiz guru, is a librarian who lives in Brooklyn.

David R. Black is's magazine editor and chief archivist. A big fan of "The Warlord," he has a cat named Shakira and is looking for a girlfriend named Tara....

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