Ass-assination Attempt on President Luthor

Metropolis - President Lex Luthor was the target yesterday of a bizarre assualt attempt on his person by his disgraced opponent, Jake "Mule" Mullet.

Mullet, candidate for the minor Techno Party, had little chance of beating Luthor, but had hoped that his candidacy would start a movement dedicated to the technological and environmental issues he championed. He drew heavily from young, idealistic voters, who have felt disenfranchised by the lack of attention paid to such issues by the major-party candidates.

However, Mullet's candidacy was dealt a fatal blow due to an embarrasing incident in which he had been knocked down and sat on by a mule. While of little political consequence, this incident received heavy play in media owned by Lex Luthor, causing him severe personal embarrassment and costing his movement much-needed momentum. It was this incident that gave Mullet the nickname by which he has become better known.

Mullet, obviously blaming Luthor for the embarrassment, sought to retaliate in kind. Using some sort of high-tech, saucer-shaped platform, he attacked President Luthor as the President was attending a photo opportunity. Thanks to a valiant attempt by a mysterious new hero who calls herself Supergirl, the attack was thwarted, although the assault weapon turned out not to be deadly, but merely embarrassing - a pie, the long-time slapstick comedy staple.

A temporary insanity plea is likely.

More interesting, perhaps, is the appearance of this new Supergirl. While somewhat different in appeaance and powers from the old one, who disappeared several weeks ago during a worldwide bout of hopelessness, it seems that she has quickly befriended Superman, with whom she stopped Riot not long ago. She has also been seen at the site of a sculpture exhibit gone wrong, and the old Supergirl has been known to have an interest in art, especially sculpture.

This, however, is the first known encounter between the new Supergirl and President Luthor. The old Supergirl had a history with President Luthor, dating back to shortly after the Brainiac invasion of Earth, when Lex was masquerading as his own son, calling himself Lex Luthor II. This younger Luthor wooed Supergirl and the two were quite an item. She led his Team Luthor hero group during the time that Superman was believed dead. However, she had a falling out with him when she learned that Luthor was making use of her genetic data without her knowledge. It was not long after that that Luthor's disguise was revealed.

President Luthor said that he did not recognize in the new Supergirl any similarities to the old one with which he was intimately familiar. Supergirl was not available for comment.

The pie is believed to have been banana cream.

Nero Foiled in Making New York Burn

New York City - Green Lantern and the Justice League saved New York City from a new super-villain, who calls himself Nero.

This individual's full name, according to the Justice League, is Alex Nero, a psychiatric patient since he was fifteen years old. Apparently Alex had been claiming for months to be meeting with aliens from a planet he called Qward. These claims were dismissed as delusional, but according to Green Lantern, they were unfortunately real. These aliens apparently gave Nero a ring not unlike the ring possessed by Green Lantern but employing a yellow sort of energy rather than a green one.

Reserve Leaguer Guy Gardner, a.k.a. Warrior was involved in the battle alongside the active Leaguers. "That's definitely a Qwardian ring," he confirmed. "I used to own one just like it, but it was destroyed when [former Green Lantern] Hal Jordan went bonkers. The one I had used to belong to a mook named Sinestro."

Sinestro, currently considered by the Justice League to be deceased, fought the previous Green Lantern numerous times. His yellow ring apparently took advantage of an impurity in that LAntern's ring which renders it useless against anything colored yellow, a weakness not possessed by the current Green Lantern's ring, or by the ring of the original Green Lantern, who was hurt in an early skirmish with Nero.

Alex Nero has been institutionalized with mental trauma since the apparent murder-suicide of his parents, Raymond and Joanne Nero. There had been suspicions at that time that Alex had killed them, but no evidence. He is believed to be schizophrenic, and, while he is a gifted artist, he is obsessed with demonic images, which make up the bulk of the ring-formations with which he tried to destroy New York. According to doctors, he is, in his own mind, a crusading hero, and sees all others as bent on the world's destruction.

The JLA hss no conjecture as yet of why aliens would empower such a person, except that the Qwardians are an evil bunch.

Prime Time Mime Crime

There was drama added to the National Cheerleader Championships last night when the box office was robbed by a group of thieves in traditional mime costumes. The thieves were stopped by Impulse.

When questioned about it, the mimes had no comment.

Now that you've read this piece,
discuss it in the Fanzing Forum!